Simple Joys of the Single Life

Single at 30? I never imagined that’s how my life would go, but it’s really not as bad as I thought. I was in a 4 ½ year relationship, but I’ve been single for almost a year now. At first, it was difficult adjusting to being alone again after so long, but I quickly started really appreciating & enjoying my alone time. I am 1,000 times less stressed than I was when I was with him. It has allowed me to regain focus on myself versus my partner & a relationship. Of course I get lonely & miss companionship sometimes, but for the most part, it’s been a nice break. Since Valentine’s Day is right around the corner & many single people get depressed, I thought I’d make a list of all the reasons I have enjoyed being single this past year to focus on the positive & hopefully help others realize some good things about being single –

1. My favorite part is probably being able to play music all day, every day without having to worry about someone else. My ex turned on the TV as soon as he walked in the door. It’s kinda hard to enjoy music with that noise in the background all the time & I am considerate, so I would typically sacrifice so he could live in the boob tube. Now, I turn my music on as soon as I walk in the door & it keeps me motivated & happy.
2. If I do want to watch TV, I can watch whatever I want whenever I want instead of the random shit he would put on all the time.
3. I’ve been able to get back to things I used to enjoy, but didn’t make time for since my relationship was always my main focus. I started reading again which I hadn’t done in years, started this blog, started Rosetta Stone again to try to finally learn Spanish, have continued my healthy lifestyle, socialize/go out more often, etc.
4. I can eat anything I want for breakfast, lunch & dinner without coordinating with someone else. I’m pretty low maintenance, prefer to eat whatever is convenient & there isn’t much I don’t like except tomatoes. He was pickier, so he wasn’t as easy as I was when it came to food. Less stress by myself.
5. I can plan my day around anything I want to do without having to run it by anyone. My ex & I basically did EVERYTHING together which I usually enjoyed, but it was exhausting at times if I just wanted to do me, ya know?
6. I’m a total night owl, so it’s nice to be able to stay up as late as I want without having to worry about disturbing my partner. It’s also great not having a snoring bear in hibernation next to me each night.
7. I can walk around, dance, cook, clean, chill, etc. naked if I want to since I live alone. Of course my ex wanted me to be naked more often, but a chick can’t do that without a dude constantly wanting to get down & dirty, which is fine sometimes, but seriously, can’t a girl just be naked & free without it always being sexual?! I often dance naked while playing music & singing, for hours sometimes, & it’s amazing! Especially since I don’t have a guy around watching & making me feel like a live-in stripper.
8. If I need to fart or drop a deuce (yes, women do that too guys even though you hate the thought of it), I can release myself without feeling self-conscious. Although, I still laugh if it’s really loud or sounds funny even when I’m alone.
9. I can immediately accept invitations to things if I want to attend without running it by my man or having an argument if he doesn’t like the people I intend on getting together with.
10. No planning surprises or buying gifts for special occasions is also a plus. When I am in a relationship, I try to make my man feel special & do sweet things, so just another reason it’s a nice break & gives my wallet a break at the same time. Win/win!
11. I don’t have to worry about having sex if I’m not in the mood since no one is around to try to coerce me. And on the other hand, if I am in the mood, my favorite friend Nalone Wave is always there for me. Seriously ladies, go buy this thing right now even though it’s pricey – I promise you it will be better than any man you have ever had & it will get its money’s worth. This might be TMI for some of you, but I’d rather you know I get down like that than sleep around with half of the male population in Tampa/St. Pete (I know quite a few chicks who do that instead, so be safe out there guys!).
12. The decisions you typically have to discuss with your significant other can now be decided based on what is best for you like where to live, your home décor, if you want a pet, etc.
13. I’m a bit OCD when it comes to cleaning & organizing, but I don’t have to do much of that anymore since it’s just me now & I keep things how I like them without someone else making messes.
14. I feel like I have so much more time on my hands & it’s great! I can fit more into a day than I used to & I feel more productive.
15. When I am in a relationship, I work hard to make sure my man finds me attractive, so I keep everything clean, fresh & tidy. Now, I don’t have to worry about primping so much if I don’t want to which is definitely another favorite part of being single. Less maintenance. Not having to shave for as long as I want if I only wear pants because no one will know except for me. I love it when a guy is checking me out & in the back of my mind I’m laughing since I know he would be repulsed if he saw my hairy, man legs.

 

As much as I have enjoyed being single & have realized I am capable of being happy alone, I would honestly love nothing more than to find my person to share life’s journey. I’m finally ready to put myself out there again (even though it scares the hell out of me), so I recently joined some dating sites since it’s obviously close to impossible to meet someone in person these days (stay tuned for a blog post about dating because I sure have a lot to share on that topic!). Most of the things I have enjoyed this past year about being single will eventually fall to the wayside again if I find someone special & things get serious, but I have also learned from my past relationship to work hard at finding a better balance of what I am willing to give up & where I will compromise. You can’t lose yourself in the midst of falling in love, so I promise myself to do better next time around.

Happy Valentine’s Day to all you love birds out there & all my fellow single folks! If you don’t have anyone in your life, always remember to love yourself & the family & friends who love you! ❤